Hey Gigi,
I can't believe you've been gone an entire year. I miss you so much. I wish we would've been closer before you left but our fractured relationship with Grandma sorta prevented that.I remember getting the call from my mom while I was at Disneyland with my friends saying that I needed to call Grandma Darcy because you were probably going to die that night. I broke down crying at the Tower of Terror, my friends held me on the sidewalk while I cried. I finally put myself together long enough to call you and say goodbye. You didn't answer me and when I hung up I lost it again. I pulled myself together so I could enjoy the rest of my trip, anxiously waiting for the phone call that you had moved on. I returned home and you were doing better, all the worry and panic that I felt was finally gone... I still had more time. I wasn't expecting to receive that message from Grandma on the morning of April 3, 2012 that you had passed on in your sleep. I sat at the table and cried. We drove down for your funeral which was over Easter weekend. The whole family got together for you, just like you wanted. I knew that your death was either going to bring us all together or push us all apart. I know I shouldn't be surprised that it pushed us apart. You were the glue holding us all together. It was because of your relationship with us, that effort that you put in that my mom tried to maintain a relationship with Grandma. You were the reason we came over to Grandma's house to visit. When you died, the glue holding us together crumbled. I miss you. I know you are happy with Grandpa though, I rest knowing you aren't in pain anymore. I remember during one of my sleepovers I had with you one time that you would cry in the morning because of the pain. When I asked you about it you told me you weren't used to people being there to hear you cry. I know you are in a better, happier place. I feel bad for crying over you, for breaking down in the bathroom at your viewing. I know you don't want us to cry, but seeing Emily holding onto you crying was one of the hardest, most heart-breaking things I have ever seen. Even now when I get a smell of your favorite perfume I have to fight back the tears because that scene plays over and over in my head. We all miss you Gigi. I know you're watching over us all, you're probably reading this right now, flabbergasted over my poor grammar. I'll see you again one day, but until that day I will continue to miss your smile and your crazy old self. I miss those little candies that you used to give me, I used to eat those to comfort me when I was sad. One last thing before I go, my associate pastor Phil and his wife Melissa had their sweet baby boy Nathaniel join heaven back in November. I think if it's possible you should check that baby boy out, he's a really special kid. I need to go to sleep cause I have school in the morning but I just wanted to tell you how much I miss you.
Love,
Becca
I can't believe you've been gone an entire year. I miss you so much. I wish we would've been closer before you left but our fractured relationship with Grandma sorta prevented that.I remember getting the call from my mom while I was at Disneyland with my friends saying that I needed to call Grandma Darcy because you were probably going to die that night. I broke down crying at the Tower of Terror, my friends held me on the sidewalk while I cried. I finally put myself together long enough to call you and say goodbye. You didn't answer me and when I hung up I lost it again. I pulled myself together so I could enjoy the rest of my trip, anxiously waiting for the phone call that you had moved on. I returned home and you were doing better, all the worry and panic that I felt was finally gone... I still had more time. I wasn't expecting to receive that message from Grandma on the morning of April 3, 2012 that you had passed on in your sleep. I sat at the table and cried. We drove down for your funeral which was over Easter weekend. The whole family got together for you, just like you wanted. I knew that your death was either going to bring us all together or push us all apart. I know I shouldn't be surprised that it pushed us apart. You were the glue holding us all together. It was because of your relationship with us, that effort that you put in that my mom tried to maintain a relationship with Grandma. You were the reason we came over to Grandma's house to visit. When you died, the glue holding us together crumbled. I miss you. I know you are happy with Grandpa though, I rest knowing you aren't in pain anymore. I remember during one of my sleepovers I had with you one time that you would cry in the morning because of the pain. When I asked you about it you told me you weren't used to people being there to hear you cry. I know you are in a better, happier place. I feel bad for crying over you, for breaking down in the bathroom at your viewing. I know you don't want us to cry, but seeing Emily holding onto you crying was one of the hardest, most heart-breaking things I have ever seen. Even now when I get a smell of your favorite perfume I have to fight back the tears because that scene plays over and over in my head. We all miss you Gigi. I know you're watching over us all, you're probably reading this right now, flabbergasted over my poor grammar. I'll see you again one day, but until that day I will continue to miss your smile and your crazy old self. I miss those little candies that you used to give me, I used to eat those to comfort me when I was sad. One last thing before I go, my associate pastor Phil and his wife Melissa had their sweet baby boy Nathaniel join heaven back in November. I think if it's possible you should check that baby boy out, he's a really special kid. I need to go to sleep cause I have school in the morning but I just wanted to tell you how much I miss you.
Love,
Becca
Becs- I cried reading that last part. You are special- please always remember that.
ReplyDeleteThank you Cassandra, I will :)
ReplyDelete